Tomorrow is my post op after a laperoscopy, hysteroscopy, endometrial removal, and discovery that I have stage IV endometriosis......... Endometriosis ........endometriosis.
I can't say it enough to sink in. Never did I think I would have this, in fact I often felt bad for the people who had to add that they did to their signatures on baby enter, two week wait, or any other fertility forum I now frequent daily.
I'm not really sure why I feel this way but I am positive that the doctor (reproductive endocrinologist RE) is going to tell me that he recommends I do 3-4 months of hormone treatments before we can move on in this turbulent ride of what ifs... But maybe I'm more at peace because we can have 3-4 months of normalcy.....
Or 3-4 months of not being pricked by a needle for 2 weeks of every month........
Or 3-4 months of not having an ultra sound wand stuck up my you know what 2 weeks of every month.......
Or 3-4 months of not caring if I'm going to wake up and get my period......
Or 3-4 months of not injecting myself with needles.....
Or 3-4 months of not counting days....
Or 3-4 months of not scorning the internet for answers......
Or 3-4 months of not living by my phone waiting for the nurses to call.......
Maybe this is why I hope to sleep soundly tonight
While this is what I think they will recommend, it's not typical that I just do what people tell me.... I have my regiment of questions and probably misconceptions from what I've read online but I'm armed and ready to go at the apt tomorrow to continue this turbulent ride of infertility. I've bought many tickets and I plan on using every single one until we get our one baby that sticks!!
No, this is why I will sleep soundly tonight......
